Or he’s on Twitter educating the ignorants (as a young gay Black man there are many) with subtle and not-so-subtle takedowns. Waddle over to YouTube and he’s lap-dancing the Devil in the video for Montero (Call Me By Your Name), snogging a guy in That’s What I Want, or dancing naked with shower-based inmates (male, duh) in Industry Baby. Switch on the radio and he’s there too. Check the charts and he’s equally dominant – three US number one singles (including 2019’s breakthrough country-rap crossover Old Town Road), and a top 2 album, Montero, on both sides of the Atlantic.
The latter came with an album roll-out that involved the 22-year-old singer/rapper, real name Montero Lamar Hill, pretending to be pregnant with his 15-track debut opus. If there’s a billboard near where you live, chances are he’s peering out from it too.
One place Lil Nas X’s face isn’t, however, is on our Zoom. It’s weird at first. His voice – a low-ish rumble with an Atlanta twang – is familiar but sounds different when disconnected from his omnipresent visage. I ask if he can turn his camera on and show me those famous grills, or even walk me round his new LA home (“I actually haven’t got any of the furniture I was supposed to get,” he chuckles), but he politely declines. A break from the glare of the spotlight is probably fair at this point.
How does it feel now you’ve finally “birthed” Montero?
Lil Nas X: It feels… wholesome.
In what way?
Lil Nas X: I feel complete. Ready for the next chapter.
Are you already thinking about your next child/album?
Lil Nas X: Yes I am. Always. I’m always creating new music. But I’m also in a place right now where I’m trying to create new music and live at the same time so I can actually have stuff to write about. I feel like songs will come to me. I’ve been living for about 22 years so I’m sure I can squeeze some stuff out of there.
Much of Montero was created in lockdown with Nas’ core production duo, Take a Daytrip (Denzel Baptiste and David Biral). The success of Old Town Road – and the subsequent controversy over what constitutes country music (spoiler alert: a lot of people in America think country means white men only) – had made his head spin.
A one-off single, last November’s Christmas-adjacent Holiday, didn’t exactly set the charts alight, which only amplified the accusations that he was nothing more than a one-hit wonder.
“When society is all down your throat about something, even if you don’t actually think about it, it starts to get into your head,” he says. Hard graft meant Holiday eventually went platinum in America, which in turn made him realise that actually his fate is in his own hands.
How did lockdown change you?
Lil Nas X: It got me back into a much more confident state of my life. I knew everything was going to work out, I knew everything was going to be fine. I read some books, watched a lot of self-help stuff.
So many things were happening – the riots, Covid, internal problems with myself, external stuff with my family. I was moving around so much, and then when Covid struck you had no choice but to sit down in one place. Like you can’t go to every show and perform and do every interview, so you get the chance to focus on what’s important.
What else were you filling your time with in lockdown?
Lil Nas X: I did not leave the house. I was with my producer friends – they’re like my brothers. We had a lot of fun together. We got into a lot of arguments about which drum loop should be where.
Are you good at relaxing in general?
Lil Nas X: I don’t find that easy. I’m kind of a restless person. I’m always trying to make sure I’m doing something. Not just keeping afloat but excelling.
You seem to work a lot – do you ever worry about burnout?
Lil Nas X: I guess not as much because I always take little breaks. Maybe I’ll have a day to myself here and there, I’ll go and get a massage, or like last night I went to watch a movie.
What did you see?
Lil Nas X: I saw the new Venom movie, it was pretty sick.
Did you see that story about how Venom might be gay?
Lil Nas X: It is kind of gay, huh. For sure, Venom is definitely part of the LGBT community.
It’s hard to get into the mindset of an overnight sensation. Imagine becoming globally renowned as a teenager. Going from living in a Georgia housing project to running a Nicki Minaj stan Twitter account to landing the longest-running US number one single ever with your debut. And then coming out to the world in the middle of that chart run.
Is it weirder going on dates now you’re famous?
Lil Nas X: No, but I do find myself being more emotionally disconnected than before. Just flowing with relationships now – the goal isn’t anything long-term anymore. I don’t know what people’s intentions are, or which version of me they like.
How does having an artist name play into that? Is there a separation between Montero Hill and Lil Nas X?
Lil Nas X: I feel like those versions of me are merging. I’m being myself more in public than before. But there’s also that thing where you don’t know what people are in love with. Do they love the things happening around me? Are they still going to like me when I’m never there because I’m zoned in on my career?
When the Montero (Call Me By Your Name) video came out, were you prepared for the pushback, especially from Christian middle America?
Lil Nas X: I had no idea it would go the way it went. I thought it was going to be a fun two days on Twitter but it ended up dragging out for a long time.
Could you have handled that fallout a few years ago?
Lil Nas X: I would not have been able to handle it. Back then I was afraid of losing what I had just gained. Now I don’t feel that. I feel confident that I got this no matter what I do, or what mistakes I make.
Do you ever stop to think about some of your achievements so far?
Lil Nas X: I actually tried some ‘shrooms the other day and had a reflective moment of like “wow.” Not even achievements – just like, I have a car, a house, fans, a top album. I usually don’t stop because I’m very much an “ok, let’s keep moving” person.
You once said your career has been built on “winging it” – in what sense?
Lil Nas X: I feel like I’m strategically winging it, if that makes sense. Putting an idea together, trying to see all the ways it could go, and then saying “ok, let’s just go for it.” If I think about something too much, I’ll end up not doing it.
Montero cleaves Lil Nas X’s persona in two. The first half is shiny pep-rally pop; the second half pores over inadequacy, suicidal thoughts, growing up gay and alone – often bolted to heavy guitars or pop-punk. Throughout, the lyrics are blunt, whether about sex (“shoot a child in your mouth while I’m riding”) or darker life experiences.
Your blunt lyricism when it comes to gay sex feels refreshing. Was it important not to talk in euphemisms?
Lil Nas X: Absolutely. I wanted to not only be blunt but even more blunt than my straight counterparts.
Why?
Lil Nas X: For one, I feel like it’s fun to hear and it’s different. We’re all adults here.
Do you ever think about the kids who loved Old Town Road?
Lil Nas X: At the beginning of this year maybe, but then I was like: I just genuinely don’t care to live for anybody’s kids. I’m not trying to cater anymore. I’m just trying to make music that’s honest to me.
Was a song like Sun Goes Down hard to write?
Lil Nas X: Yeah. I’m not used to showing people the sadder side of myself, or even going to the studio and talking about what I went through as a child. It feels awkward. But I was like: this will help people. And it’s great for an album titled after me to show everything.
For a long time, Nas says, he struggled with people not seeing him as a person. An internet native, he always used social media to find community. Suddenly, the internet seemed to be consuming him.
“I feel like that’s something people forget,” he says. “Especially with non-artists or people who are famous. The Kardashians or whatnot – you forget that these are people too and we all go through the same experiences.”
As 2021 comes to an end, are you happy?
Lil Nas X: Er, yeah. I feel like I’ve been in a happy place for a long time, especially since last summer when I started to think to myself that the only moment to be happy in is right now. What I’ve learned in these last couple of years is that the journey is usually the best part – not the goal you have in mind.